You are not good enough - Apply for jobs in Germany
I am applying for a working student job at the moment, try to make a move to Germany when I am still studying in Italy. And after a lot of application, I got this interview with a company in Berlin. We had a talk, things seem to go alright, I did my best.
I did the interview while I am still working in the exposition, which is a very heavy job that I might get back to you later on other posts. But I have no choice of doing the interview in the meanwhile because when I got the invitation, I already agreed to go to work this time. So its not easy to making a call while I was working in the exhibition with massive crows and so many things going on, but I did it. And they seem to like me.
I got to the 2nd round which means they gave me a technical test, it was doing a whole campaign to attract their new customers - ok way too much in my opinion. However, I am in a position that I will have to do anything to catch the opportunity. Got back from the exhibition, exhausting and I know I have to do the work. I spent 3-4 days reading, research and make the campaign, til the end I was just so happy that I finished the job and sent them. I know you know the result, I failed. Yes, fucking fail. How?
Got back home after a tiring days walking around Rome to do many paper works, I put myself on the bed and got an email from them. And the email, which is like a slap on my face ""We found your presentation quite basic and without real explanation on why you chose the audience." I was down, I got angry, I think how can they be so rude to write an email like that? And, I still angry. I know we mostly all been there, where we find ourselves not as good as we think, maybe I am not that good as I thought? I hope you understand me well, the moment you put a lot effort to try to archive something, you got through halfway, and you came with all the hope, and then life slapped you! Like if you know that you will not going out with a guy you think he's cute, and he disappeared, it is not a big deal, but if you already went out with him 1-2 times, you start liking him, start having connection, and imagination, you think he 's cute. And... he's disappeared. You will be angry, you will be disappointed, even got few drinks because of that(same go if you are dating a girl). Yes, its life, it's how emotion works, and yes, I realize, its fucking ok to be down sometime. And believe me, my friends, if you read it, ITS FUCKING OK IF THEY THINK YOU ARE NOT GOOD ENOUGH.
So what? I am not the best, I am not that good at something, I am not always winning, or simply just different opinions. I am learning as a new comer in marketing field, and I probably will meet this again. I am thinking, life is not only about try to be the best, you will never know everything, and you can still live your life meaningfully. I do not mean that you should not try, but I think the whole idea of trying is just to make your life more happy, more value, to have better presentation with the world maybe? and to be appreciate maybe not even that much important.
I am hope you are happy with yourself, happy with what you are trying to do, and happy on the way you doing that. As I said, I used to work in finance, I was a manager which means I can cut all that crap, but I was not happy, I am ready now to do all this craps all over again, but as long as I am happy, it's a journey I want to take in my life. I do not care about fame, about how other people think, how they evaluate me. Because I want to have fully decision of my time, my perception, even some HR person said that I am not good enough for them (again, I used to hire people, and what they said is not always standard for everything). Maybe they are right, at the moment I am not, but I am totally fine with it, and I will be more than enough soon, which I believe so.
Til then, go back, work again on my project, get more idea and brainstorming, I will get a good one!
I did the interview while I am still working in the exposition, which is a very heavy job that I might get back to you later on other posts. But I have no choice of doing the interview in the meanwhile because when I got the invitation, I already agreed to go to work this time. So its not easy to making a call while I was working in the exhibition with massive crows and so many things going on, but I did it. And they seem to like me.
I got to the 2nd round which means they gave me a technical test, it was doing a whole campaign to attract their new customers - ok way too much in my opinion. However, I am in a position that I will have to do anything to catch the opportunity. Got back from the exhibition, exhausting and I know I have to do the work. I spent 3-4 days reading, research and make the campaign, til the end I was just so happy that I finished the job and sent them. I know you know the result, I failed. Yes, fucking fail. How?
Got back home after a tiring days walking around Rome to do many paper works, I put myself on the bed and got an email from them. And the email, which is like a slap on my face ""We found your presentation quite basic and without real explanation on why you chose the audience." I was down, I got angry, I think how can they be so rude to write an email like that? And, I still angry. I know we mostly all been there, where we find ourselves not as good as we think, maybe I am not that good as I thought? I hope you understand me well, the moment you put a lot effort to try to archive something, you got through halfway, and you came with all the hope, and then life slapped you! Like if you know that you will not going out with a guy you think he's cute, and he disappeared, it is not a big deal, but if you already went out with him 1-2 times, you start liking him, start having connection, and imagination, you think he 's cute. And... he's disappeared. You will be angry, you will be disappointed, even got few drinks because of that(same go if you are dating a girl). Yes, its life, it's how emotion works, and yes, I realize, its fucking ok to be down sometime. And believe me, my friends, if you read it, ITS FUCKING OK IF THEY THINK YOU ARE NOT GOOD ENOUGH.
So what? I am not the best, I am not that good at something, I am not always winning, or simply just different opinions. I am learning as a new comer in marketing field, and I probably will meet this again. I am thinking, life is not only about try to be the best, you will never know everything, and you can still live your life meaningfully. I do not mean that you should not try, but I think the whole idea of trying is just to make your life more happy, more value, to have better presentation with the world maybe? and to be appreciate maybe not even that much important.
I am hope you are happy with yourself, happy with what you are trying to do, and happy on the way you doing that. As I said, I used to work in finance, I was a manager which means I can cut all that crap, but I was not happy, I am ready now to do all this craps all over again, but as long as I am happy, it's a journey I want to take in my life. I do not care about fame, about how other people think, how they evaluate me. Because I want to have fully decision of my time, my perception, even some HR person said that I am not good enough for them (again, I used to hire people, and what they said is not always standard for everything). Maybe they are right, at the moment I am not, but I am totally fine with it, and I will be more than enough soon, which I believe so.
Til then, go back, work again on my project, get more idea and brainstorming, I will get a good one!
Rome,26 Feb 2020 - For angry moment
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